I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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