I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Randomize
