found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
