you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
