So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
