She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Randomize
