Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Randomize
