Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
