she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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