ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
