this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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