when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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