so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Randomize
