Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
