Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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