Farmville is her only friend.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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