i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
