Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
