I feel like abortions should bother me more
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I need moral support for this bender
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
