She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize