Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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