I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize
