I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
