help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
