Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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