My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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