I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize