Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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