BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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