well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Ladies don't puke and tell
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
