I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
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