I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
