Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Everclear isn't food dammit
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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