Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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