I hope mine doesn't look like that
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
