As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Randomize
