Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I think I am morally bankrupt
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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