if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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