why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
