I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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