I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I think a kid would responsible me up
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
