I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
