First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
