i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Randomize