yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
