you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
