shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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