its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
