I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
