she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize